Child Marriage. 21st century and it's still argued about

For as long as can remember child marriage has been considered a social evil and did not even imagine that anyone from the modern world could think otherwise. But i was wrong or worse ignorant.

A friend of mine, very much a part of the educated-fight for out rights-youthful mass still believes and agrees with the concept (evil is what i still call but we'' keep it for after this post) of child marriage. Of course thanks (many thanks) to Child Marriage Restraint Act of 1929 he cant practice it when he has children of his own.

His (this educated-fighting for his rights-youth) argument is laying down conditions by parent on marriage at an early stage, before, emotions such as love and desire, and physical attraction sets in and thwart the process of selecting a life partner. Marriage should have nothing to do with physical characteristics of the boy and the girl. At a young and innocent age the couple will develop a genuine fondness for each other unhindered by adolescent objectives.

I have to say when i heard this i was dumbfounded and i cannot say if its because i could not believe that this educated-fighting for his rights-youth-etc-etc was saying it or because i actually found meaning in his statements.Out of the blue, someone terming a long condemned social-evil as, not just "not so bad" but the "right thing to do!" was a little hard to digest.

It took me a while, but i soon realised that his was a Utopian version of child marriage, where the parents who,as commonly said , know whats best , decide who their off springs should be betrothed to based on family background, culture and some other factors (which i can't recollect). But reality is far from it.
The reality - child marriage is prevalent, mostly in the poorest countries (such as India, Malaysia and Africa) and among the poorest households. Reasons being in these areas only the men-folk are engaged in paid-work and parents of the girls worry for their daughters future and economic support. Marrying off the girls at a young age rids them of the economic burden. This step does not solve the poverty stricken situation that the girls are in and in most cases it gets worse (with abuses, prostitution etc). And yes in the current situation girls face most of the ill-effects of this custom.

"The educated parents will be able to choose the right-partner and guide the children, such that adolescence will not confuse them and result in inter-caste marriages, inter marital affairs etc". Well like it or not the truth is love infatuation are all human tendencies and normal. Controlling these emotions is up to each individual and marrying a child off will not prevent those hormones from being secreted when the time comes! crudely put ... but that's the bitter truth.

In India the situation is pretty much the same, except for a few cultural/religious reasons if believed in justify child-marriage. I have below an excerpt from a website which well is trying to bring back 'culture' into our modernised-cultureless society-
"In childhood a girl does not ask questions. It is now that she will, out of her simple faith, look upon her husband as Paramesvara. This faith, formed in her innocence, will take firm root in her mind when she becomes older and begins to understand things. It is all the influence of our ages-old dharma of womanhood. A woman's devotion to her husband will now be enduring and she will always look upon him as Paramesvara. When a wife dedicates herself to her husband and does not nurse any feelings of honour or dishonour so far as she herself is concerned, her ego will become extinct. And that means cessation from wordly existence; in other words, liberation. Devotion, jnana, austerities, worship, sacrifices, yoga -- all these have for their goal the eradication of the ego. This a woman obtains naturally and with ease through devotion to her husband. "
How long will we follow a centuries old custom in which the wife worships her husband. We are fighting for equality here. But just as passing thought ... why didn't the rules ever be phrased as where "the man worships the wife" (I'm sure a lot of problems could be solved - IF men were capable of this feat!). But for sure the thought would have never passed 'cause all the scriptures, holy books, etc were written by... yes! you guessed it right- MEN!

Guess I have gone a little off track, but in the process driven the point home to my educated-fighting-for-rights-friend (and a few of the others who had the misfortune of reading this)